Mr. D came to the studio ready to kill his session. I mean, can you believe this guy has an eight-year old?? Look at that bod! There’s no waaaaay, he’s had a kid….no possible way. And 31?? I doubt it. He looks so good for his age.
Do we realize how fucking ridiculous that sounds? I have yet to see this shit on a post of a man. While surviving any birthday and the ability to have children are milestones not awarded to many, I don’t think the intent of people commenting these things are thinking of that perspective. I am in far too many photographer groups/facebook groups/and social communities where this bullshit chatter is the norm…in regards to women. Whenever a photo of a woman who fits the stereotypical societal standards of beauty is posted, there is a caption and comments that applaud her for “looking so good after having babies” and “This woman just gave birth and she looks sooooo good”…..ummmm….I am not saying don’t appreciate the women who fall into the societal standard of beauty nor am I saying don’t celebrate the ability of women to have children….I am saying we need to stop saying shit like this and reducing women to their capacity to have children AND maintain a svelte figure. We can appreciate beauty without saying shit like “CAN YOU BELIEVE SHE HAS 3 CHILDREN??? OMG I WOULD DIE TO LOOK LIKE THAT!” It just continues to perpetuate the fallacy that women need to get back to a pre-baby body (which, fyi, is technically impossible unless you are willing to shove your baby back up your hoo ha) Same thing with the age thing….”SHE LOOKS SO AAAAMAZING FOR 65″….MAYBE SHE DOES LOOK AMAZING, BUT IT’S NOT DESPITE HER NUMBER OF YEARS ON THIS PLANET!! When we say things like this, it continues to remind women that they have to uphold a certain look or aesthetic despite having children, getting older, etc. Can we just stop please? Next time you are viewing and appreciating a woman’s beauty, try to refrain from using phrases like that. Next time you are having a chat with your friends, avoid saying things like “Omigod, you look so good for just having a baby” or “You age beautifully” and while people may look beautiful and “so good” you don’t need to tack on the reason why you are SURPRISED they look so good…it’s a shitty thing to do and I assume you are a good human. So, after this ranty post, I urge you to listen to the conversations around you, online and in person, compliment people for their qualities, both physical and not, be mindful of the chatter you are contributing to…oh and enjoy some photos of Mr. D who delightfully shared his life and time with me so I COULD write this ranty post.